A Reflection on Vocation

"Young man, keep your mouth shut and your bowels open!" With this pithy piece of advice from my beloved pastor, I was sent off to the seminary and began the great adventure toward priesthood. It seemed that I would never complete twelve years of training, but despite hard work and harder discernment, I was finally within two years of ordination, and then lighting struck!

This "lighting" took the form of the Second Vatican Council, whose vision of a renewed church captured my imagination and has consumed my pastoral energies these past thirty five years.

The journey "toward priesthood" was nothing compared to the journey "into priesthood." The latter has been incredibly richer, more diverse and more challenging than I could ever have imagined. The move from an idealistic young priest "ready to save the world" to a more seasoned veteran humbly seeking God along with every one else — and doing it as a public vocation — has been one full of "God's mysterious ways." It has taken a while to figure out that God did not expect brilliance or perfection, but only faithfulness. The "...mouth was not always closed and the bowels were not always open...," but the years have been characterized by a sincere desire to remain faithful and committed, even in dark days and periods of wonderment.

I had no earthly idea why I was called to priesthood then, and I'm sure there were a lot of mixed motives along the way, but I realized more and more than I would have chosen my own. I never heard the voice of God in my head saying, "Be a priest!", but I have heard the voices of God's people supporting me in that choice, then and now. I have felt that many of the demands and expectations were beyond my capabilities, but I have also discovered that perceived strengths were not always my friends and perceived weaknesses were not always my enemies. It ultimately came down to figuring out whose "will" I was trying to do.

The priesthood is a noble calling, as is marriage or parenthood. Each has its unique challenges and rewards. Each demands an uncommon faithfulness in a society that desires everything and treasures little. I remain a priest today not simply because I have accumulated thirty-five years of service or couldn't do anything else at this age, but rather because I still feel newly ordained in many ways: Because I am more and more convinced of the need for quality community leadership with our church. Because I still believe that, despite its sins and shortcomings, the church is still the best hope the human family has for a voice of compassion, justice and care for one another.

I still want to be part of something (or Something) bigger than myself that can, and most often does, enhance people's lives and make them better. Everyday reminds me that I have made only small steps into the total self-giving priesthood of Jesus Christ, but I will keep trying and will pray "...that what we offer to God will be truly pleasing and acceptable to the Father Almighty!"

Father Nick Rice
Our Lady of Lourdes Church
Louisville, KentuckY